Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Gay Superheroes: This will end badly

Ever wonder what happened to the gay superheroes of our youth? Well, OK, there weren't any out of the closet until recently, but pretty much, they all suffered desperately gruesome, un-superheroic fates. Pretty much, it doesn't pay to be a gay superhero.

Here's a list from a Harper's list of homosexual comic-book characters and what happened to them. It was compiled by Perry Moore, the author of Hero, a young-adult novel about a gay teenage superhero, published by Hyperion.

AMAZON: crippled, made a supervillain terrorist, electrocuted
APOLLO: gang-raped
BATWOMAN: revealed as a closeted lesbian, kidnapped, tortured; stabbed herself through the stomach with a sword
BLARNEY COCK: disemboweled, whereupon a gerbil crawled out of his anus

BLOKE: killed on first mission
NED CAMPBELL: slashed into bits after his wife finds him having sex with a male lover
CAPTAIN METROPOLIS: decapitated
CAPTAIN POWER: disfigured by an explosion, driven to insanity, murder
CHAIN: dead
KAROLINA DEAN, HULKING, & WICCAN: tortured while straight teammates were not
DESTINY: dead
DESTROYER: in the closet
FRENCHIE DUCHAMP: alcoholic, double-amputee; beaten nearly to death with his prosthetic leg
ELECTRO: realized he was a homosexual after a lengthy stint in prison
EL EXTRANO, “THE STRANGE ONE”: attacked by an AIDS vampire
FAUNA: dead
FREEDOM RING: finger sliced off; impaled on twenty-eight spikes, including one through the groin and anus
GREEN ARROW II/CONNOR HAWKE: made retroactively heterosexual
HOODED JUSTICE: murdered by teammate
ICE: murdered, last seen in hell
JARVIS: shot through the head, dead
JERICHO: impaled on his father’s sword
JETMAN: blackmailed by a villain who threatens to out him
KARMA: raped as a child, kidnapped, disfigured; later reappears but is too fat to move on her own
WALTER KASKO: killed in a botched gang-slaying
MADAME FATAL: dead; his funeral, attended by drag queens, is mocked
MIDNIGHTER: heart ripped out
MONSIEUR MALLAH & THE BRAIN: sadistic gorilla and disembodied brain in a jar; searching for a body for the Brain so they can consummate their love
MOONDRAGON: kidnapped, ear ripped off by a villain who makes her girlfriend deliver it to Moondragon’s father as a ransom note
NORTHSTAR: killed in three different realities, resurrected as a zombie assassin
OBSIDIAN: depowered, corrupted by his sexual strife, manipulated by dark forces, thwarted in an attempt to destroy the world, made a security guard for a team of heterosexual superheroes but not allowed to sit with them at the table
PHAT: dead
PIED PIPER: parents murdered by teammate
RAWHIDE KID: revealed he was only pretending to be gay
ROBIN: exposed as a villain; explained that his turn to the dark side was due to his unrequited love for Batman
SHATTERSTAR: rewritten as a heterosexual
SHOUT OUT: thumbs ripped off
SILHOUETTE: murdered, along with her lover, after being outed
SUNFIRE II: dead
ULTIMATE NORTHSTAR: shot at point-blank range, left to die
UNION JACK II: dead
WING: admitted crush to his mentor, who broke his arm and beat him; given a check for $750,000 and forced to leave his superhero group in dishonor

1 comment:

Libby said...

Keep up the good work.