Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Elvis did it

If you're one of those people who hears hoofbeats and immediately thinks, "Here comes a herd of long-extinct eohippuses from 50 million years ago, likely regenerated in DNA experiments directed by the Gnomes of Bilderburg in concert with the undead Nazi Josef Mengele and Big Oil!" ... well, you need to read Mark Morford's column, "Long Live the 9/11 Conspiracy," in today's San Francisco Chronicle. Much of it relies on Mark Jacobson's New York magazine piece, which merely whets the conspiracy theorists' appetites.

Morford is a radical Leftist wing-nut with a gift for sarcasm, but his column (which contains links to many of the conspiracy sites) will certainly get blood pumping to parts of your anatomy that haven't had a good spurt in a while. That's his job. In part, he writes:
"You probably already know that much of what exactly happened on Sept. 11 remains deeply unsettling and largely unsolved -- or to put another way, if you don't know all of this and if you fully and blithely accept the official Sept. 11 story, well, you haven't been paying close enough attention."

Why did a lot of stockholders in American and United airlines sell short on Sept. 10? Who can explain the collapse of a building that wasn't hit? Is it true no blood or major wreckage was found at the Pennsylvania crash site? Is any of that even true? Was there a second shooter? Were aliens involved?

The Radical Left -- which applies brainpower only selectively -- will accept as Gospel that Dick Cheney personally piloted all four airplanes, bailing out just before impact. The Radical Right -- which applies brainpower only selectively -- will call it the REAL 9/11 conspiracy and look away. Nobody will seek reasonable and logical answers for the real remaining questions.

Me? Hell, I believe Osama bin Laden and his vampires planned it, and it turned out even more grotesque than they imagined. And Osama must be sitting back in his Pakistani villa right now, laughing at how Americans are obsessed with making every event more complicated than it is. He accomplished more than he expected: He has us chasing shadows and looking under the bed at night.

And, of course, if you hear hoofbeats, think the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

5 comments:

Love, Rita said...

Yeah, I'm with you. Osama and his spooks planned it and carried it out and are sitting on their fannies right now laughing at how much more destruction they caused than they intended. And we ARE chasing shadows (and WMD's) that don't exsist!

SingingSkies said...

I don't for a moment doubt that there's info we don't have about 9/11, but nothing along the lines of Morford's column. There seems to be an amnesia about bin Laden's involvement in the earlier WTC bombing attempt. bin Laden's group had been trying to bring the towers down since at least 1993. Maybe the Radical Lefts have just found some Rube Goldberg machinations to justify working around it. Seems to be the standard operating procedure for those at the fringes.

I'm with you on who's responsible and the fallout. Wonder when reason will overcome the radical fringes. Hope it's soon!

Patrick Joubert Conlon said...

I'll always keep one eye on conspiracy theories but I don't have the time or inclination to live in paranoia like Morford - gives me dyspepsia.

Michael Gillespie said...

Apparently the Bushies need Osama bin Laden as much as, or more than, America needs oil. Before finding Osama or finishing his war in Afghanistan, Bush turned his attention to Iraq and launched a trillion dollar and still counting war there; a war that has already taken the lives of well over 2,000 American service men and women, not to mention uncounted tens of thousands of Iraqis, many if not most of them innocent non-combatants, women, and children; a war for which the rationale has changed again and again; a war that has reduced rather than increased Iraq's oil output; a war that has grieviously, perhaps irreparably, damaged America's moral standing in the world; a war that Bush now says he plans to leave to future presidents (note the use of the plural); a war that retired Army Lt. General William Odom, former Director of the National Security Agency and former Assistant Chief of Staff for Intelligence, the Army's senior intelligence officer -- hardly a radical Leftist -- called "the greatest strategic disaster in American history." Yet, while racking up a $3 trillion dollar national debt, the largest in the nation's history, an $800 billion per year trade deficit, and borrowing more than $2 billion every day, most of it from the communist Chinese government, to pay for their foreign wars and their astonishing plunge into profligacy, the Bushies, for some mysterious reason, have not found it necessary to devote the resources necessary to capturing or killing Osama bin Laden. I can hardly wait to find out how and why, exactly, the blame for this oversight is to be laid at the feet of so-called radical Leftists.

Chancelucky said...

I know this can be one of those rabbit holes out of which the mind never emerges, but the New York magazine has some interesting stuff about the 3rd New York building that collapses that day. It does seem strange and I do think it's a reasonable question.

I'm still a little in shock that the US air defense system 45 minutes after an attack on New York can't track and intercept a civilian airliner that's within miles of the pentagon and White House.

the 911 report doesn't explain it that well. That doesn't mean I've slipped into the lone airliner on the grassy knoll camp, but I don't think asking questions about what happened is unhealthy at all, especially given the reluctance of the Administration to answer questions about 9/11 and its aftermath.

I'm sure all major events have loose ends. The biggest loose end though has been the failure to track and capture Osama himself. If he's laughing at our need to make the story more complicated than necessary, it's partly because we haven't put the resources into bringing him to justice.