Now, it's not fair to judge all fans by the nation's 167,239 sports columnists, each of whose job is to say outrageous things and then go suck up to pro athletes. But Boston Herald and ESPN columnist Gene Wojciechowski shows how puerile (I used that word specifically because most sports columnists don't recognize it) and parochial they can be. Woj might not cheer in the press box, but he whines in print this morning:
"I have a better chance of slipping the Lombardi Trophy some post-Super Bowl tongue than the Denver Broncos do this year. That's because neither of us are going to be playing in The XL at Ford Field come Feb. 5. And if the Broncos do make it to Detroit, I'll pay the barbershop tab for Jake Plummer to shave the worst beard this side of an Amish barn raising. ...
"'We got the win, that's all that matters,' said Plummer.
"That's sort of true. Criticizing a team after it reaches the AFC championship is like ripping Angelina Jolie for wearing too much lip gloss. But I can't help it. If the Broncos think they can play like this and beat the Colts in Indy, or even the Steelers at Mile High, then they're suffering from oxygen deprivation. ..."
"As Plummer jogged off the field and toward the stadium tunnel, he stopped just long enough to hand the game ball to a 10-year-old boy leaning against the railing. His name was Jack Dunnigan, and for several minutes he was so stunned by the gesture that he couldn't speak. Memo to Jack: Hold onto that ball. It will be the last one Plummer hands out this season. "
Woj, your team lost. They lost because they made a lot of mistakes. Ask somebody what "class" is, go buy some, and show it off. And when it comes to criticizing ugly beards, buddy ... well, you wouldn't get much on eBay for yours.